Tuesday Review – The Kitchen (2019)

the_kitchen_poster5_star_rating_system_1_and_a_half_stars It feels as if Melissa McCarthy and I have been here too many times before. Me wanting to believe that her latest film would be the one to give her the role she deserved. And, coming off the back of her amazing performance in Can You Ever Forgive Me? I was confident that she was on her way up. The Kitchen seemed like a great fit. Based on a Vertigo comic book miniseries about housewives taking their husbands’ place in the Irish mob. It’s an adaptation written and directed by Andrea Berloff and starring Elisabeth Moss and Tiffany Haddish. This was a film that was making so many promises about celebrating women that I had to believe that it would be perfect. But could it ever live up to our expectations?

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Tuesday Review – Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019)

godzilla_e28093_king_of_the_monsters_28201929_poster5_star_rating_system_1_and_a_half_stars I think we were all a little bit surprised by how good Gareth Edwards’ Godzilla was back in 2014. Although, that was nothing to do with Edwards. Of all the directors who could have got the job, he was definitely up there near the top of the list of most suited people. But it was the second time Hollywood had made a Godzilla film and, let’s be honest, the first time had gone about as bad as it could have. That’s the problem with Matthew Broderick. When he’s good, he’s good. But when he’s bad, it’ll haunt you for the rest of your life. I mean we’re lucky that film didn’t start a major international incident. But Edwards and co turned it around. They made a pretty decent film. It was sophisticated and not your usual blockbuster disaster movie. And it was exciting to hear that a sequel was in the pipelines with Edwards expected to return. Then, in 2016, Edwards left the project and we were left in some kind of limbo. Would it be able to live up to its predecessor without the director making a return? There was only one way to find out.

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Stranger Things 3: I’m hopping mad actually

hopper-defense-1200x676It’s been over two weeks since the third season of Stranger Things came out and I finally think it’s okay to rant about it. Especially after seeing a few posts on Instagram this weekend. It’s something I’ve been feeling since I watched the show the weekend it came out and, thankfully, I know I’m not the only one. So, in lieu of my normal Monday post, I’m doing this instead. It’s been a while since I’ve had a good rant though. It’s been nearly 2 months. That’s quite a lot of rage to keep inside. It was bound to find an outlet eventually.

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TBT – The Emoji Movie (2017)

dp_3603343_tc_1400x2100_dp_3603344_emojimovie_2000x3000_est_25_Star_Rating_System_0_and_half_star I get bored with the argument that Hollywood has run out of original ideas. It’s an argument made by people who only give a shit about blockbuster films. Yes, we see a lot of sequels, reboots, and remakes these days but that’s not to say there aren’t original films. Independent cinema and world cinema are full of interesting and unique ideas that most supposed film lovers wouldn’t know about. Okay, there’s an argument to be made for the accessibility of these films. One that I understand the pain of. I live in the North of England and we don’t tend to get a lot of smaller films here. I mean we’ve only really just got access to National Theatre Live on a large scale. But that’s not something to go into now. So, yes, I don’t agree that filmmakers are running out of ideas. However, sometimes a film comes along where you have to think this must have been scraping the bottom of the barrel of film ideas. That they were literally out of all other ideas. The Emoji Movie was one of those films.

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TBT: X-Men: Apocalypse (2016)

x-men_-_apocalypse5_star_rating_system_2_stars Have you heard? The latest film in the X-Men franchise is also the worst.  Which, considering the third and sixth films were both such stinking piles of crap. All of the hate surrounding Dark Phoenix got me so confused that I had to go back and rewatch X-Men: Apocalypse to make sure I wasn’t remembering it wrong. Maybe I’d just imagined that it was kind of disappointing? Maybe I had just loved Days of Future Past so much that I’d been extra harsh? I mean, it had been 3 years since I saw it. Although, in those years comic books movies have only continued to get better. Marvel have really hit their stride in the last 2 or 3 years. It’s highly likely that it’s the reason people are so harsh on Dark Phoenix. It came out months after Endgame and a year after Infinity War and Black Panther dominated the box office. Maybe we’ve just started to expect more from our superhero movies? Maybe we expect something that Fox were never going to be able to give us?

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TBT – Must Like Dogs (2005)

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I made a bold claim on Tuesday that I liked every romantic-comedy starring John Cusack. Well, I said that before I remembered just how many shitty romantic-comedies he’s been in. I mean he’s not up to Tom Hanks numbers yet but there are some bad ones. I mean I can kind of give Serendipity a pass because of the book thing but America’s Sweethearts? Urgh. High Fidelity and Say Anything really do a lot for his reputation as a romantic hero I guess. Or maybe I just do a lot for it? I do love him. And I have done since that first time I saw him holding that boom box outside Ione Skye’s window. I’d recently seen a John Cusack romantic-comedy that I’d never seen appear on Netflix, so I decided it could really answer the question once and for all. Is John Cusack the romantic hero of my dreams or my nightmares?

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FBF – A Night at the Roxbury (1998)

a_night_at_the_roxbury5_star_rating_system_1_star So, you may have noticed that this week’s Throwback Thursday post is actually a day late. And, if I’m honest, I nearly didn’t write it at all. I ended up meeting a friend yesterday so couldn’t get time to post. And today? Well, I just couldn’t be bothered. I watched the film earlier in the week and it left me totally uninspired. But I’m here. Trying to stick to my schedule. If I start letting myself believe that I don’t have to do things then I won’t do them. It’s like Instagram. I’m having a massive Instagram crisis and I keep telling myself it doesn’t matter. Which, to be fair is true but that’s not the point. The whole reason for keeping this blog up and doing my Instagram stuff is to help in my career. Now, I’m not being delusional. I know that this isn’t going to get me anywhere but it means I can try things that might help at work. So, yeah, what I’m saying is you’re my test subjects. Don’t you feel special? At least I kind of know what I’m talking about with you guys. I work for a company that sells football kits so, now I’m in charge of their blog, I have to write a football related post every week. I know nothing about football. I don’t even know the vocabulary. In the last week, I’ve used the word “cross” in a football-related context countless times never knowing if I was using it correctly! Best not to dwell.

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TBT – The Green Lantern (2011)

92724a64abf2f94ba4456c9c26be95a45_star_rating_system_1_star On Tuesday I reviewed Shazam! a DC film starring Mark Strong. So, what film could I possibly watch for this Throwback Thursday post? How about a DC film starring Mark Strong? Especially as it’s considered to be one of the worst superhero movies of all time. It even has a lower rating than X-Men Origins. Of course, they both star Ryan Reynolds. Until Deadpool was finally released, it seemed as though that guy just wasn’t going to make the superhero thing work. On the plus side, it isn’t the worst the film in DC history. Catwoman and Jonah Hex will forever beat anything and then there’s Joel Schumacher’s reign of terror. But, certainly, Green Lantern has to be one of the biggest missteps in comic book movie history. It’s just become an easy joke. Something that Ryan Reynolds is more than happy to join in with as evidenced by that line in Deadpool.  I guess something good finally did come out of this film.

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Book Review – Campusland by Scott Johnson

cover160389-medium5_star_rating_system_1_star As you know, I’ve been trying to get my way through all of the NetGalley books I’ve had waiting on my shelf for months. I always feel really guilty when I go on a requesting binge and then buy a load of new books to read. Plus, I have my ratio to think about. I requested Campusland because it sounded fun. It’s almost impossible to not think about Animal House in this situation. Which is both a good and a bad thing I guess. When you’ve already been lucky enough to watch the best college-based comedy we’re ever likely to see, it means nothing else will compare. But it also means you’re willing to try and find the next one. So, when I saw Campusland on NetGalley I couldn’t resist giving it a go. I should have known better. I really should have known better. It’s what I go through with psychological thrillers every time. I expect something new and different but just end up angry and full of regret. Shame I’ve got nobody but myself to blame.

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Book Review – Vox by Christina Dalcher

img_20190407_121121-0152815122958061560.jpeg5_star_rating_system_2_and_a_half_stars I had a random encounter with a stranger because of this book. This isn’t something that normally happens to me but a woman approached me because of what I was reading. During a short train ride this weekend, I was rushing to finish my chapter before I got off at the final stop. Prompting a fellow passenger to tell me I’d have to finish it later. She then informed me that she’d recently bought the book for her daughter but she hadn’t read it yet. I’m not used to this happening because I’m always fearful of popular fiction. Meaning I’m not normally reading books that are topping the best sellers lists. That wasn’t supposed to sound like such a weird and patronising brag as it does. I just mean, I’m normally met with blank stares or bemused nods when someone spies the cover of my current read.

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