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TBT – The Emoji Movie (2017)

dp_3603343_tc_1400x2100_dp_3603344_emojimovie_2000x3000_est_25_Star_Rating_System_0_and_half_star I get bored with the argument that Hollywood has run out of original ideas. It’s an argument made by people who only give a shit about blockbuster films. Yes, we see a lot of sequels, reboots, and remakes these days but that’s not to say there aren’t original films. Independent cinema and world cinema are full of interesting and unique ideas that most supposed film lovers wouldn’t know about. Okay, there’s an argument to be made for the accessibility of these films. One that I understand the pain of. I live in the North of England and we don’t tend to get a lot of smaller films here. I mean we’ve only really just got access to National Theatre Live on a large scale. But that’s not something to go into now. So, yes, I don’t agree that filmmakers are running out of ideas. However, sometimes a film comes along where you have to think this must have been scraping the bottom of the barrel of film ideas. That they were literally out of all other ideas. The Emoji Movie was one of those films.

If The Emoji Movie hadn’t been on Netflix now I definitely wouldn’t have watched it. Now that I have what can I say about it? It’s everything that I thought it would be and less. In terms of story, this is a rip off of so many animated films. It’s essentially Wreck It Ralph and The Lego Movie but with much less charm. A misfit emoji finds himself alienated from the rest of his town and must ask the mysterious loner for help. The loner is a super cool hacker who promises that the misfit can get to the Cloud, which will apparently will solve all of his problems. But, unfortunately, it’s not as simple as that as bad guys are out to stop them. It’s such a boring and uninspired concept that I can’t even be bothered to explain it any further.

And, let’s be honest, this isn’t a film that was created to tell a decent story. It’s a loud and colourful advertisement for apps. If the makers of this film had put as much work into the story as it did trying to showcase Spotify and Just Dance it might have been a different story. But without those things The Emoji Movie wouldn’t exist. There’s so much that I don’t understand about this film. The logic is weird, the casting is weird, and it doesn’t seem to know its audience. And then there’s the fact that James Corden is on-screen for most of the film. James Corden at his most irritating and hyper.

This film isn’t just bad; it’s the worst. It lacks humour, decent characters, memorable performances, or interesting animation. It’s just a really bad advert. And I’m done giving it any more time than I already have.

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Categories: films reviews

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Murdocal

Who is Murdocal? A casual critic who is a little bit too obsessed with pop culture. A young woman who swears and rants much more than she knows she should whilst trying to make her way in an adult world she isn't prepared for. A not as recent as she'd like literature graduate who, between job applications and subsequent rejections, has turned to the internet to fight the boredom and review the shit out of everything.

"Maybe, just maybe, I'm the faller. Every family has someone who falls, who doesn't make the grade, who stumbles, who life trips up. Maybe I'm our faller."

5 replies

  1. Couldn’t have said it better. This was the first movie we watched at the last birthday party – and it was so boring it almost stopped the party. Harry Potter came to the rescue but I am still wondering: how is it even possible for people with such creativity in their skulls and so much in money in their hands to produce something that…stupid?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh my. Thank God for Harry Potter! It is amazing that loads of people saw the final cut of this film and thought “yeah, that’ll be fine.” I imagine the process of making it didn’t take long!

      Liked by 1 person

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